I had a very revealing experience last Thursday when at Spear Physical Therapy for my first therapeutic massage with Quanawa. I arrived on the 15th floor as I always do, hung my winter coat in the closet near the elevators and placed the rest of my belongings in a training room locker.
Most folks have a routine they do whenever departing a place. Mine includes doing a “pat down” for my important belongings when leaving therapy or doctor appointments. I first pat my back pocket for my iPhone, then my winter jacket pockets for my wallet, and then grab my backpack or purse before exiting.
I have harbored a fear of someday misplacing my wallet because it has everything that is important to me in one place: house keys, monthly subway card, cash, bank cards, drivers license and Medicare card. It is a gold Coach wallet attached to a keychain that was given to me by the Barba family many years ago and this old friend has been with me ever since.
Thursday’s “pat down” revealed that this very important belonging was missing! In the past, I would have spiraled out of control and begun catastrophizing about how I was going to get home, how to get inside my apartment, even how to eat. Or worse, the damage that could be done by anyone else who found it!
This time, while standing in the Spear lobby, I surprised myself with how much grace I handled this terror-inducing moment. I thoroughly took apart my entire backpack to examine its contents. Nothing. Then I calmly asked the front desk if I had left a gold wallet there. No. Next, I moved to the massage room to see if I happened to have left it behind. Not there either…
As I began to exhaust all the logical places to check, my neck began to tighten and my breath quickened. Before the spiraling began, I stopped, closed my eyes and took a deep breath. All is in divine order I affirmed silently. As if receiving a direct answer to prayer, I felt guided to check the coat closet one last time.
There on the floor, in the back of the closet near the elevators was the gold wallet. In that instant, the fear and agony transformed into a smile, a deep sigh of relief, and a reunited warmth in my heart.
There was only one response appropriate for how I felt. I called PP for our daily prayer call to express my complete gratitude for the miracle that had just occurred. In prayer, Britt reminded me that nothing is ever lost in spirit, and even if I ever do misplace the wallet in the future, to have faith that God’s got this. A powerful healing occurred in that moment, and I no longer hold this dreadful fear. I will continue to do the routine “pat down”, as this strategy has served me well. Now, I have a little more room in my consciousness for miracles like this one to unfold.